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  Publicity Stills of
"Sorority Row"
(Courtesy of Shaw)

Genre: Horror/Thriller
Director: Stewart Handler
Cast: Briana Evigan, Jamie Chung, Rumer Willis, Julian Morris, Leah Pipes, Audrina Patridge, Margo Harshman, Matt Lanter, Carrie Fisher
RunTime: 1 hr 41 mins
Released By: Shaw
Rating: TBA
Official Website: http://sororityrowmovie.com/

Opening Day: 8 October 2009


When five sorority girls inadvertently cause the murder of one of their sisters in a prank gone wrong, they agree to keep the matter to themselves and never speak of it again, so they can get on with their lives. This proves easier said than done, when after graduation a mysterious killer goes after the five of them and anyone who knows their secret.

Movie Review:

You know the drill to making these films it is staple to fill the screen with beautiful bodies willing to flaunt their assets, and the opening scenes established everything right going for it, with plenty of hot bods gyrating to senseless music, under the influence of drink, drugs and everybody having sex on their minds. And what more the lead characters here are all females, from relatively better known ones whom you know will have a better chance of survival Rumer Willis (well, the offspring of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore), Jamie Chung (from Dragonball Evolution) and Briana Evigan (Step Up 2 The Streets), to those unceremoniously inserted for gratuitous, passing shots.

It's no wonder as well that the film went horribly wrong right from the start, both in storytelling techniques, and the predicament that the sorority sisters of the Theta-Pi house face from a prank gone morbidly wrong, where one of their own becomes a real corpse, and the rest decide through some strange ritual of voting, and listening to the save-your-own-skin rationalization from ring leader Jessica (Leah Pipes), that they swear to keep that night's event a secret. There's a little integrity tussle between established do-gooder Cassidy (Briana Evigan) and Jessica and the breakdown of the group's solidarity, but otherwise it serves only as an exercise for the audience to know who to trust amongst the bunch of bad hats.

So with most of the characters made unlikable and probably deserve that's due to come to them, it certainly took a long time, some 30 minutes, before one of them fell victim to a cloaked figure utilizing the exact same steel weapon on their demised friend. Trust me this villain will not find any cult longevity to be included in the Great Hall of Infamy. Constant harassment ensued, very much like a cheap knockoff of I Know What You Did Last Summer (well, actually 8 months ago) with the ghoul spooking and dispatching the girls one after another, except that director Stewart Hendler really needed an exercise in building suspense, and keeping things tight through not having villains succumb to the need for monologues with verbatim explanations.

Most scenes of death were averagely designed, and for fans of the genre you'll probably be jaded enough to see some of them coming from a mile away. It played on cliches with all the tricks coming from the same bag. The body count is kept extremely low with some scenes being quiet sterile, and I'm pretty surprised at those who managed to walk into the sunset. Probably the only redeeming grace to make this film slightly bearable to watch would be Carrie Fisher's short supporting role (what was she thinking when she accepted this?) as the protective sorority house-mistress packing a mean shotgun, acting tough and inflicting maximum damage; brings back some memories when she was Rebel Leader, leading a bunch of space jocks, compared to whiny, bitchy supermodel wannabes.

Sorority Row could have been fun while it lasted, but the lacklustre pacing took away most of its shine.

Movie Rating:

(For all its hot bod sorority sisters, the only one worthy to watch this for, happens to be a senior citizen)

Review by Stefan Shih


. Prom Night (2008)

. Dead Proof (2007)

. The Convenant (2006)

. Cry Wolf (2005)

. Dead Mary DVD (2007)

. 5ive Girls DVD (2007)


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