no-hopers. One cursed village. One hell of a night!
Director: Philip James Claydon
Cast: Silvia Colloca, James Corden, Tiffany
Mulheron, MyAnna Buring, John Pierce-Jones
RunTime: 1 hr 24 mins
Released By: Shaw
Rating: M18 (Violence and Coarse Language)
Official Website: http://www.lesbianvampirekillersmovie.com/
Opening Day: 22 October 2009
no-hopers. One cursed village. A bus full of foreign female
students and an army of salacious lesbian vampires. It's gonna
be one hell of a night!
winning comedy-duo James Corden and Mathew Horne ( Gavin &
Stacey ) decide to escape their problems and head to the country
for a weekend of debauchery.
don't quite go according to plan and they find themselves
stuck in a village where all of the women have been enslaved
by a legendary vampire curse. As the night unfolds the boys
have to put all of their fears (and dreams!) behind them in
order to rise to the challenge of becoming Lesbian Vampire
Did a double take on the title of the movie? No surprises there. Word went around that the brains behind the movie challenged themselves to come up with as ridiculous a name as possible for a movie and the best they came up with was Lesbian Vampire Killers. This reviewer shudders to think what else they came up with but he is pretty curious to find out too!
With such a title, the last thing one should expect would be an all-out action adventure in the vein of Die Hard and be prepared for something along the vein of Shaun of the Dead. It is easy to compare Lesbian Vampire Killers with Shaun of the Dead considering that they do not fall into a specific genre unless one considers impaling the undead in funny ways as a possible category or genre. However, what Shaun of the Dead was full of, Lesbian Vampire Killers lacked sorely.
The campy goodness of the movie begins with a quick prologue telling about the curse that has befallen the town of Cragwich – the Vampire Queen Carmilla, after being defeated by Baron Wolfgang MacLaren, curses every girl in the town will be turned into a vampire on her eighteenth birthday. Our two gallant gentlemen, Jimmy (Matthew Horne) and Fletch (James Corden) enter in present day setting. Jimmy has been having girl trouble and Fletch convinces him to take a trip. Relying on fate, they throw a dart on a map to determine their journey and as fate would have it, they head to Cragwich.
When in Cragwich, they stumble upon a group of hot girls who have also arrived in the boring town. They then help the girls out with when their van gives them trouble and they head to an old cottage, which they later discover has been abandoned but kept alive for travelers who they send to the cottage as sacrifice for the other lesbian vampires in the town. What ensues next is a mad affair with the vampires attacking the group and quickly converting the girls into lesbian vampires and the duo setting off Camilla’s resurrection.
The movie is pretty short and from the get go, we more or less join our duo who are everyday zeroes on their journey towards becoming famous heroes. The duo of Jimmy and Fletch is pretty likeable. Jimmy is the loser who lost the girl and has a constantly deadpan face while Fletch is the rotund loser who wants girls but cannot get them. The rest of the cast is filled up with sexy girls who have obviously been chosen more for their looks than their acting and in a hilarious supporting role; Paul McGann hams it up as the Vicar hell-bent on stopping the lesbian vampires.
For a movie like this, it is no surprise that there are several contrivances that occur that are never fully explained or done with reason. This is an over-the-top affair filled with crude moments and innuendos that never seem to run dry. Look out for the one with the sword ala Excalibur but with a handle in the shape of a penis or what happens to the vampires when they are extinguished. This is not a particularly intelligent movie but it never runs away from the typical black humour of British comedy. This is a fun movie to laugh along to but nothing that one will remember for time to come. Well, except for the expletive-spouting Vicar perhaps.
(Campy Vampires are hard to match up to the evergreen draw of sexy vampires)
Review by Mohamad Shaifulbahri